We've all been there...you help someone through an emotional or financial crisis, you give all the support you can muster, even, at times, at the sacrifice of yourself or others you love. You give your time, advice, money...all because you care for this person...you want to see them happy again, in a better place in life. Self-sufficiency is usually the goal...in the meantime, you are the crutch that holds them up along the way.
But, what happens when that someone decides to go a different way? What happens when that someone gets worse or decides to take a negative path? I had to ask myself these questions when a friend of mine decided to leave this life by her own will. You see, I blamed myself for her choice. I felt guilty...if only I'd done more...if only I'd called that one time. Then, I got frustrated...no, I did do more, and I was always there for her...why the hell didn't it work? What more was I really supposed to do? The burden was heavy, it was too much at times...but, I gladly did it because I wanted to see her happy...joyful.
You have those that would argue varying spiritual viewpoints on how this could've been avoided. But, that needs a whole blog series to explain and give justice. So, I'm not going there...I'm just going to focus on this one point. There comes a time in life where we learn how to HONOR other people's choices...even when we don't agree with them. In honoring their choices, we have to step back, not take judgment, and love them anyhow. We have to learn that we are not responsible for what others decide to do. And, there are times when it's appropriate to just let go...and let GOD.
I really feel this is how God loves us...it's called FREE WILL. He honors every choice we make in life, whether it's seemingly good or bad. There is no judgment...just unconditional love. And, I believe these situations come into our lives to really teach us that. While we think it's hard to watch a loved one go through things we see as unnecessary...God watches us in the same way. He provides us with options...choices...He is always there to help, support, love, uplift, cleanse, heal...but it is up to us as individuals to walk through that door to receive. There is a saying we all know, and that is: God helps those who help themselves. A person cannot be helped unless they WANT to be helped!
In looking at things through these eyes, we see that there is not necessarily right or wrong, but different choices that lead to different paths. And, there comes a time in ALL our lives where we have to watch someone go down a path of destruction. It hurts, we want to sacrifice ourselves to turn them around, but after its all said and done, we CANNOT blame ourselves when our trying seems to be in vain. It is in these moments that we have to stop blaming ourselves, let go, let GOD...and HONOR other people's choices...
